Tuesday, January 27, 2009

a bacon cheeseburger from Chilis

:) hellooooo!

ahh, how is it that I feel I have been here forever and yet it's been only 2 weeks? In a way I feel like I should be packing up now and saying, "that was fun see ya later!" haha and then I realize I have over 3 more months here! Exciting and scary all at the same time, as usual. But...
"If you risk nothing, you risk everything." :)

Before I forget: for those of you who don't have a facebook and would like to see some pictures, here is a link to some pictures I've taken of the city and my home here :)
http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2013730&l=1cc85&id=1042110068

Also, I am officially making the titles of my blogs the name of the food that I am most currently craving from the US. :) hahah

Thank you to alllll of you for the birthday wishes I know you were all sending. My birthday was a lot of funnn. In the evening I had a really nice dinner with my family at the house and was allowed to have Sam come over (Sam is one of my best friends at BU and is the only person I knew coming on this trip). Being a family of musicians, they played me "Happy Birthday" on the violin and guitar and Rocio (mi senora) brought out a cake she made :) It was so sweet of all of them. They put those trickster candles on it so I spent a good 5 minutes blowing them out haha Guille was crying because he wanted it to be his birthday and when I asked him if he wanted to help me blow out the candles he ran up the stairs screaming and crying. haha, true bonding right there. It's okay though, he got a hair cut yesterday and I called him guapo (handsome) so now I think I'm back on his good side. jajaja. But yes, the dinner was so sweet of them, they hung little birthday decorations and even got me a few pieces of jewelry as a gift. Yet again, another birthday full of such fortune and blessings. I am constantly reminded how lucky I am when my birthday comes around, I can feel so much love from everyone (even those of you 6000 miles away on the west coast!). Truly blessed.

So not only was this my birthday weekend it was also all of ours first reaaal weekend here (and my 1st 3 day weekend ever!). So I went out with friends on Thursday, pretty low key, to a nice bar and just chatted until they kicked us out around 2:30am. Friday was a bit more crazy :) I lived the life of a true spanaird haha Basically I took a nap from 11pm-12am and met up with friends at 1am only to stay out until 6am :) I only paid for one drink the entire weekend! haha yesss i love birthdays! haha. It was really fun. I stayed in on Saturday considering how my body was slightly confused as to what the hell i was doing to it. I felt kinda bad though on Saturday the family had over 2 other familes for this huge breakfast and I slept through the whole thing.. haha that's kinda where the gray area comes in as to what I feel is right and wrong. When they tell me about things I don't know if they are telling me as in I have to be there or as a heads up or as an invitation? Meh, hopefully soon I'll understand that a little better.

The days during the weekend were fun too. I visited the Museo de Prado! Craaazy. I also went to a Symphony Orchestra with a few friends on Friday night before we all went out. It was interesting, because I realized I think for the first time, significantly, how universal music can be. I was sitting in this huge place with hundreds of other people and it didn't matter who spoke english or spanish or whatever, it was silent and we could all here the same thing. I don't know, I also had a slightly profound moment when I visited la iglesia de los jeronomes after the Prado. It is this amazing church, I can't even explain how magnificent it is. But I went and sat in the front to pray, for literally, each and every one of you. After, as I was looking/admiring the "decorations", I realized how still everything in the church is. I'm not sure if this is even coming across right, when I tried to explain it to the people I went with they joked around how I was basically crazy haha It was just this intense contrast in motion, how busy life is, how much happens, and during all of it, those figures and "decorations" remain completely constant. Across miles and miles so much takes place, and yet these objects remain completely untouched. I wonder if I am noticing such things because of the huge upheavel my life has seem to undergo in these last 2 weeks. I just don't think I've ever had to take in so much in such a short amount of time and things like motion and the contrast between movement and stillness is something that is obvious to me right now, seeing that I am slightly stuck between both worlds, internally and externally.

Classes are hard. I lovee the staff that works here though. Through out my time at BU I've grown a slight resentment towards lack of connection with the faculty and being basically a number. The office staff here is small and very close, and knows every single one of our names. I had never talked to the director before and when I asked him a question on the 2nd day he knew my name haha, just the energy in the office when you walk in is so great. There is a very obvious vibe that they are all there for us, to help us have an amazing experience and learn. So I've really liked that. Also, the Institute I'm at holds numerous colleges so it's been nice to meet people in different programs from different colleges around the US. Unfortunatly, my number of spanaird friends / legit spanish speaking people are few, so I need to work on that. It's obviously still really early and understandable that the majority of ppl I go out with on the weekend are english speaking, I just really need to start putting myself out there and force myself into those uncomfortable situations where I basically don't know what anyone is saying hahah

I feel I have gotten more quiet as the days go. I think it's starting to sink in more that this is a sink or swim situation and there's kind of no way around feeling so out of place at times. I mentioned I felt my spanish was already getting better after the first few days and now I feel it's worse than before haha I just am very tired of constantly interrupting people and asking, "Que? Que?" And even when they explain it I usually don't get it and just am frankly too embarrassed to ask a hundredth time. I knooow you are all thinking they don't care, which I know the majority of the time they don't, it's still just hard. I also realize once I ask them to repeat it and they write it down, I realize I already knew the word, it was just the way they were saying it that made me not able to understand. So it's a combination of the accent, the pace of speaking, and the language itself. But step by step!

I am really enjoying the meals here. I am eating so healthy. Today for lunch I ate swordfish with some kind of tomatoe rice soup. I've had more fish in these last 2 weeks than I have in my entire life haha. I not only enjoy having actual meals that are soso healthy, I also enjoy having it being made for me :) haha it's almost easier when I don't have to decide what to eat. I never know what I'm about to eat until I sit down and they put it infront of me. The parents always serve everyone at the table, at first it was weird but now I'm getting use to it. Dinner is always the best time with my family because we are all together and relaxed. I come home for lunch too alot but it's never the whole family there. I had one really great dinner last week with the family that made me very happy. Just lots of laughing and communication.

It's already been too long since I've seen all of your beautiful faces and I cannot wait until the time comes when I get to give each and every one of you a hug :)

Besos y Abrazos,
apb

Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Estoy Aqui!

Hola Mis Amores,

Ha I almost started typing this in Spanish. I am so sorry for having taken so long to write, as you can imagine it's been a chaotic last few days and today was my 1st real run through day. Forewarning, this is going to be a liiiiitle lengthy... :) From the begining!

But first my number!
Soo if you do call, you have to get a calling card (duh) and then you will push in:
011-34-678158774 :)
011 is for the international call, 34 is for Espana, and the rest is my number here.

Okay so now from the begining!

Flying in and starting Thursday off with no sleep was really odd. Wednesday and Thursday combined into one day, as my flight was an overnight one that I didn't sleep a minute of. We were all thrilled/exhausted but that didn't keep 20 or so of us in! Ha I went out that Thursday night with 20 or so other people to a bar in Santanas Plaza. Very fun! It was awesome, there were taps in the middle of the table and we could serve ourselves in huge mugs. There was a TV screen keeping track of how many liters of beer we were drinking and that's how we paid at the end. I had such a fun time that night... that I paid for the next morning, a lot. Ha Friday was orientation and let's just say I spent a good quarter of it in the bathroom... Hahaha It was actually hilarious for me as that's not usually my way of entering a new chapter of my life, but hey, it happens no? haha Orientation, naturally, was painful because of my physical state of being but informative and good. Didn't go out that night, which was sad because I really don't know a single person who didn't go out. I had barely made it through the day and wasn't trying to move in with my new family smelling/looking like a bar. hahah The 2 days in the hotel were pretty overwhelming just with the mass amount of students I was surrounded by. It felt like being back in 1st week of Freshmen year when no one knows anyone and everyone is overly excited and equally as nervous and wants friends. haha so that was, to be honest, exhausting, especially in my already overloaded emotional/physical/mental body, so I was ready to move in with the family on Saturday.

So Saturday! Rough. Hahaha Aamzing! but rough. I pulled up to the house around 11am and was downstairs with the family for literally 9 and half hours until 8:30pm when I went out to meet up with friends for dinner. Ah! My brain was mush. Legit. I had to listen and focus so intensely on EVERY singleeeeee word they were saying. Even during finals and exams or whatever you do in life, you can take a break! Yeaaah going to the bathroom was my break. Rough on the brain. I was going to write on here that night but I literally didn't think I had the mental capacity to do so in a way you would all understand haha. Going to bed was kinda hard that night, just completely overwhelmed. Sunday was much better but I'll talk about that after I detour into a little detail about my family!

:) Let's just say I did something good in my past life because my house/room is LEGIIIT. It is a modern, beautiful 4 story house, in which I have the 4th floor alllll to myself :) I don't think I'll have this much space/this kind of room again in my life so I'm enjoying it. In it: a huge couch, a desk, 2 closet things, my bed, a side desk, a bathroom(!), and seriously enough floor space to have a dance party. Haha It's orange and white, and since it's the 4th floor my ceilings are slanted. I have 3 sky lights, 2 in my room and one in the bathroom. The lighting is really nice, those cool light fixtures you see in Ikea or Starbucks. It's the iiiish. Oh, and my bed is comfy! Definitely a plus haha. The walls are thin though so I hear everything and it wakes me up early in the morning. The house is gorgeous! Modern. Yellow, orange and white walls with lots of art and decoration. Beautiful hardwood floors and stairs. Both parents, my senora Rocio y her husband Marce (said Marthe with the spanish accent haha), are both musicians and teach the violin at a university here. Both my 13 year old sister Cris (short for Cristina) and my 5 year old brother Guille (pronounced gee-a, short for William) both play as well. It's pretty intense. The daughter just had a concert the other night playing the violin, she is very good. They pratice downstairs in this open and beautiful room with an entire wall full of books (It sounds much like a house I would have of my own in the states no? with art and books and colors). Guille is learning the piano and chello. Haha i think the parents play all 3. The daughter seems busy, she goes to an english speaking HS until 2pm and then over to her parents univeristy for lessons. BusyBusy. Guille loves socccer and TV haha, when I got here he was out playing at a game. It's cute we play in the house sometimes before dinner and I juke him out (since I'm so good and everything). When he scores a goal he screams "GOOOOAL" like the announcers do in profession spanish soccer games (makes me think of you dad! haha). It's cute. :) Cris is really sweet. She showed me around the area when I 1st got here and took me grocery shopping to pick out foods I liked. It's interesting though because 13/14 is such an interesting/hard age and I wish I knew better how to feel out where she is in all that teenage stuff. That kind of goes for the whole family though. The language barrier is hard in really feeling, understanding, and obviously communicating with each person as individuals so I feel its a very surface relationship that I hope will eventually deepen with time and with my increased fluency. I'm having a hard time splitting my time because I was one of the only few who got an actual family, many of the other students only got Senoras, and because of this a lot of ppl don't go home for lunch after school or worry much about being home. You all know how loyal of a person I am and sometimes I think it is too much. For example, putting the family before myself? I obviously want to strengthen my relationship with the family and be able to be a part of it so I'm really torn on how to be independent here and not let them hold me back on doing things outside of the house with friends, but also at the same time getting to a point beyond being just a guest in their house that they are housing for 4 months. So... we'll see I guess?

A little more about my first day: the family is very bright. We played four different games that afternoon and all of them were thought-provoking games, such as Scrabble in spanish (words I participated with: salsa & bajo. what whaaaaaat! haha). They had a family friend come over both on Saturday and Sunday, a couple - Richard & Carmen - with their 2 little boys Pablo, 5 (Guille's friend) and Simon, 3. Just to let you all know, Simon has officially stolen my heart. haha he's so adorable. So the 1st day not only was it my new family but this whole other family with kids screaming/crying/laughing (I dreamt that night of kids running up and down stairs screaming spanish words I didn't understand haha). It's definitely a different environment since I've always been the youngest. It's interesting to see Cris & Guille interact. She isnt too mean to him yet which makes me believe she isn't that far into her teenage stages lol. The family couple seems bright as well, with conversations of the Spanish Civil War and past US Presidents. Big stuff I wish I could have participated in adequately. (haha as I type right now Cris is practing the Violin in her room. There is always classical music playing in the kitchen during breakfast, the newspaper is always out). You would all be so proud! I have eaten everything they have made me! None of it was forced either! I mean some were better than others but I've been proud of myself! haha So healthy. Alwwwaaaays vegetables and protein. And then maybe a little bit of carbs but legit a healthy diet. Good stuff. Minus the fact lunch is so small I starve until our 9:30pm dinner but I think I'm going to buy some snacks and keep them in my room jajaja).

I started class on Mondaaay. Tough. I have a practica class from 10am-1130, and then a gramatica from 1130-1. So 3 straight hours of spanish class a day plus an additional Spanish Civilization history class from 530-7 on Mondays & Wednesdays. The practica part of my spanish classes seem easy - basically just need to entertain the guy by laughing at his jokes and participating in conversation. We haven't had to write a single thing, the entire class is based around conversation. Gramatica seems haaard though. The teacher seems like she will be really good but hard. I didn't understand any of the homework we had last night and that freaked me out a bit but hopefully I'll pick it up quick. The history class is nice. I love history but just have a hard time retaining all the information. I think history and current events are such a big part of conversations we have with eachother and that it's important to be educated on it, and I often wish I was more educated in that arena, so this will good. The 1st 6 weeks are taught in English, but after that it will be taught entirely in spanish including a final exam in spanish, eeek. That'll be hard. I have 3 books to read but luckily only 1 is in spanish. It was funny, school was the last thing on my mind here, obviously. And then when I now have +100 pages to read by tomorrow (some in spanish), and 4 spanish exercises to do, I'm realizing quite quickly, "Oh yeeeah, I'm in college." ha.

Spain is beautiful. It is so different! And in a way I, unfortunately, can't quite really explain. There are little things though: the streets and subway systems - spotless. So weird! No trash aaaaaanywhere it's crazy! So So clean. People are rarely on their phones, no one is ever running to catch the Metro, people barrrely honk. The taxi driver who took me to my house was going SLOW ha, can you believe it? It was like he was going for his afternoon cruise or something I was shocked! I've heard repeatedly, here and in the states, that Spain's mentality is Life Before Work. I see that in small ways, but nothing huge yet. Today I was actually disappointed after a conversation with a girl I just met. She was saying how back in the states she's like crazy-stressed-OCD girl and here she's soo much better and she was like, "Oh I love who I am here!" haha I was like, "Oh." lol Caaan you take some of my stress then? haha I know it's so early and we all have our different way of adjusting. One of my main goals here though was to find a balance and let myself relax. I really want to be able to bring that back to the states with me. Hopefully it will happen :) To be honest I'm trying to not have any expectations for my experience here. Yes I hope to become fluent and relaxed and this more cultured and wised woman of Spain haha, but if I'm not then what? Ha. I just want to take my experience here for what it is in this moment. I am doing what I can, literally reminding myself, one thing at a time.

I watched the Inauguration today at a International Hotel. Amazing.

It is late and I have muuch to do, plus I'm sure this has been enough for now :)

I love and miss each and every one of you,
apb

Friday, January 9, 2009

5 Days til Take Offffffff!

my dearest friends and family,

I know I have different relationships with all of you and that many conversations will take place outside of this blog, but I thought this would be good for general stuff that can be easily shared with everybody :)

SO! for a general overview of what's happening! I'm in the Level 1B program which is the lowest program possible haha yes! There is Level 1B, 1C, 1D, Level 2 and Level 3. Altogether there are about 80 of us. I'm flying out of New York the 14th with a group flight and arrive in Madrid on the 15th followed by a 3 day orientation that will consist of getting cell phones, books, euros, info about our classes/home stays/ the city!

I move in with my host family on Sat. the 17th (or Sun. the 18th, i dont remember) which is exciting and nerve-racking at the same time. The only information I have about the family is I am living with a woman named Rocio Gomez, her husband, her two children (13 & 5), and their two bunnies! haha I don't know any names or the sex of the kids but it will be fun having little brothers/sisters and bunny rabbitsss!! haha.

I start classes on Monday the 19th at the Instituto Internacional. I'm only taking 3 classes and they are all based around Language - a Gramatica class, a Practica class, and a Spanish Civilization class. I am luckylucky because although I only have 3 classes I still get 16 credits AND 3 day weekends. woo woooooo! In my level there are only 2 other ppl so I have a pretty amazing opportunity to have a one-on-one relationship with my professor and therefore hopefully become really proficient in the language (can't skip any class though... jajaja just kiddding I would never.... :)

I'll put my home address below in case you feel ilke sending me some lovin (coughcoughhinthint) hahah just kiddddinggg! it's actually not recommended that any packages or mail get sent out because of it getting "lost", but if you feel like good karma is on your side, go for it. I'll let you all know my international cell phone number when I get it.

Until then, so much love xoxo
apb

Calle de Iquitos, 5
28027, Madrid, Spain